Yesterday was a day.
It was one of those big, smelly, hateful days that makes you want to run home to mom. Well, if you have a warm fuzzy mom that would give you a hug and say “there, there.” My mom probably doesn’t fall into that category, instead she would say “Suck it up and get back to work.”
Seriously though, my Monday got off to a craptastical start at 11:53pm on Sunday night when I received a call from a client in India. I will never know how they got their hands on my phone number, but it woke me up and I was up for hours.
Here is the thing, as I grow older, I NEED sleep. I mean, I need 5 hours. I’m not going to shoot for the moon and try to get 8, that’s just crazy. However, in order to be a less dreadful human, I need about 5. I got less than 3. So, ya. I blame India.
As I’ve mentioned before, I’ve been struggling with an ear infection that just won’t go away. It’s impacted my health, my balance and my ability to fly. It impacted my Monday. I proceeded to struggle with some other issues yesterday morning that were out of my control to fix, yet still had meaning to my morning.
Over the years, I’ve become attracted to working for companies that are start-ups. It’s challenging, exciting, but you can actually make impact if you do it right. Some days are thrilling whereas other days drag you through the mud behind a 4X4 truck. I bet you can guess what kind of day it was yesterday. While I was driving to another meeting (in which I was a total hose beast), I talked to a friend/colleague about the life of a start up. She helped me look at the frustrations and separate the ones I could control (few) and the ones I just had to let play out (many). It actually helped.
I just don’t like days that I don’t feel productive. That’s really what it comes down to in the end. Call me a control freak, but I hate fixing issues that I had suggested were going to be problems before they were issues. It’s the inner child in me that wants to yell “I TOLD YOU SO.”
But I didn’t.
I wanted to, but I didn’t.
Ok, so maybe at one point yesterday, I strongly implied such thoughts, but I’m pretty sure the words didn’t come out that way.
By 6:50pm last night, I unplugged. I made dinner, and watched tv. I chilled the heck out. I didn’t even make my list of things to do today, because I just needed to stop thinking.
I got about 7 hours of sleep last night and it helped.
Here is what I know to be true:
1.) You can provide an opinion, but it doesn’t guarantee that someone is going to take it.
2.) You should not be an asshole and say “i told you so” when you see something failing.
3.) After you have provided an opinion, or guidance and it’s not taken, just step away. Let the chips fall. You can’t control everything.
4.) It’s really ok to say no once in a while. Really. It’s ok.
I’m thankful for the friends that listened to me yesterday. I’m grateful for the colleagues that provided sound advice. The best part of the day yesterday? I didn’t unleash the flying monkeys. Sure, I was flying on my broom, but today, it’s back in the closet. I’m playing the role of the Good Witch today. The Wicked Witch is taking a nap.